A session exploring the idea of pornography and accountability with boys.

Suitable For Ages 11 upwards (although ideally 13 upwards)

Required: Pictures of various objects including an attractive girl, pens, paper, handouts and bibles

Extra Files Needed (i.e. worksheets etc): Porn Flyer | Youtube Link 1 | Youtube Link 2 | Youtube Link 3

Intro Game: Have pictures around the room numbered 1 – 15 of various things – car, bike, fashion stuff, computers, landscape etc. and a hot girl. Ask the guys to make a note of the ones that really attract of excite them. Compare the results – nearly everyone should be attracted to the hot girl.

Game 2: Ask them to draw a five pound note – select the best drawing and give them a prize (don’t show them the fiver!)

Explain: Draw the following points from the games

1- All of us respond powerfully to pictures of people we’re attracted to
2- There are some things we can see again and again without really noticing. There are some things that immediately jolt our attention into action.
3- A picture of something is no substitute for the real thing!

Ask: What are we talking about?

Answer: Pornography!

Ask: Are these things porn?

Page 3 of The SUN
Playboy Magazine
The D.H. Lawrence novel Lady Chattery’s Lover
FHM
A Mills & Boon Novel
Picasso’s Blue Nude
The Video ‘Hot & Horny in Amsterdam’

Explain: Some statistics!
87% of all teens are online
The Average age of the first internet exposure to porn is 11!
90% of 8-16 year olds have viewed porn online (mostly whilst doing homework)
26 children’s character names linked to thousands of porn sites (including pokemon & action man)
80% of 15-17 year olds have multiple hardcore exposures
Scary aren’t they?

Discussion: Invite the young people into groups to discuss these

Video: Play Pete The Porno Puppet 1/2

‘Kittens’
(both from xxxchurch.com or from our youtube links at the top of this page)

Testimonies: From xxxchurch – heading to xxxchurch.com you’ll find some testimonies from real people and their experiences. The ones we used are at the bottom of this page.

Groups: Split into 2 groups (older & younger) and give them the following bible verses, ask them to ask the following 2 questions for the verses

Bible Verses – Philippians 4:8, Job 31:1, Ephesians 5:3-4, Matthew 5:27-28, James 1:13-15

Questions
1 – How does this verse apply to the subject we’re discussing?
2 – Do they affect our attitude to pornography?

Now discuss these verses in light of the previous ones

Galations 6:1, James 5:16, Romans 12:2

Explain: At this stage summarise the general message from the bible verses in a relevant way to your group.

Practical Pointers: Give the young people the handouts and explain to them the importance of accountability and having someone they can talk to about it, explain that it’s something a lot of people struggle with but that it’s important to talk to someone and put filters on your computers.

Pray to close and make sure leaders are around after for a chat if young people need to respond.

Porn Testimonies We Used

1 – Scott

I have writen confessions on this before and they have helped a lot but i have never been able to completly stop. i go a day or so then i have the urge to do it again. It makes me feel horrible inside yet i stile do it. It has control over me i dont know how to get away from it. Many people have said i should talk to someone or get the X3 watch. But I am kinda a loner and have a few good friends who all masterbate to porn too. And other people i feel to ashamed to tell them. if anyone could give me advise on what to do that would be great. The good thing is i have gone 2 days, i know it doesnt sound like a lot but is is a big step for me. please pray for me.

2 – Unknown
I refuse to use the word “addicted”, but I’m been pretty constantly looking at porn for quite some time now. I’m a freshman in college, and it probably started my freshman year of high school. I don’t know if porn is all that is to blame, but I ended up taking things way too far way too often with my last girlfriend. For seven months, sex and pron filled my time. One day, however, God finally slapped my wrist and told me to get my dang priorities straight. I broke up with her and that felt nice for a while. However, after getting sex on a regular basis, it’s hard to quit cold turkey, so porn stayed a large part of my life. However, after some time, God saw fit to bless me with an amazing girlfriend. I don’t know why, and I’m not gonna question Him, but there you have it. After we’d been together for a while, I decided it was only fair to share my big dirty secret with her. It really upset her. She wasn’t mad, she was sad. And that was worse. Knowing how much I’d just hurt her cut me deep. I’d had the X3 software on my computer before, but my accountability partner had basically just told me to quit every time something questionable popped up. This time, I put my girlfriend on the list. I know it hurts her to see me looking at other women (for the record, me and the new girlfriend have not had sex, and do not intend to until married), so I do my best not to. We also instituted a reward/money saving system where for every clean report, I’m allowed to buy myself. Being a music addict, it’s just not worth it to go another two weeks without music just to see some pornography. Being a lover, I can’t stand to know that I’ve let her, and Him for that matter, down. At this point, I’ve been clean for three weeks. My first reward was a Pillar CD, and let me tell you, they never sounded so good as they did when I knew I’d earned it. Masturbation is still an issue, and I do intend to remedy it, but for now, I’m proud that I’m cleaning up my act, and I hope others are inspired to do so by my confessoin.

3 – Unknown
Mmkay, so I think I might be a relatively rare case where I am nearly 18 and had not discovered masturbation until about 3 months ago. That being said, since the discovery has entered my life, I have fought a continual losing battle to overcome “the dragons” of lust and sexual addiction that are threatening my life. I am being tempted on levels that I didn’t know were possible, and its beating the crap out of me, or beating the crap into me, as the case may be. I have made commitments to God, covenants to stop, but every time I fail… and the shame just keeps growing. I’m beginning to think that I can’t win on my own, that I need God to be strong through me, but I’m not sure what that looks like. I remembered a friend mentioned this site, so I’ve come here for help. If you’re reading this, please pray for me. Thank you.

4 – Unknown
i hate me… i love me… why am i so screwed up inside? i’ve been asking myself this since i became a christian i though that it was a thing i’d stop when i got baptized and was saved but i came home from the mens retreat and looked at it the very next night. i am 16 years old a male and i’ve been looking at PORN and masturbating since i was 11 i was baptized at 12 i’m still looking at it i have vowed that i’ll stop looking at porn and masturbating as of tonight even if it kills me to do so! serously i ask God that he forgive me and help me if he wont help me then i ask that he kill me. i wont die by my own hand but if he wills not to help i wish him to strike me dead where I sit….I guess he does have a purpose for me cause I’m not dead right now. lease pray for me if i’m not dead by God’s hand i’ll post more later